BLOG: I KNOW, IT’S NOT FAIR LADIES

TIPS ON BEING AWARE OF YOUR SURROUNDINGS AND STAYING SAFE.

 

By Kimberly Arland 08/22/2018

I’m writing this at the risk of sounding dramatic—especially to those who (fortunately) haven’t had experiences included in the following.

As you know, we are not responsible for others’ actions and we shouldn’t have to make changes to our way of living because of others’ depravity.

I know we should be able to go and walk and run and drive and be anywhere we want at any time we want. But that’s not the world we live in honey-bun.

I know that any and everything we want to do is permissible; but not everything we want to do is beneficial.

Yes, it’s a free country, but even within our freedoms, we ought to have relevant boundaries—boundaries that protect us from “them”: The Crazies.

These Crazies are relying on your boundary-less, rebellious, “nothing’s ever happened to me”, “I should be able to do and go anywhere I want” self.

They’re waiting on your “No one would ever attack me, ‘I’m senior citizen/I’m with my girlfriends/I’m a mother in public with her child/children’” self.

These people doing harm to (mostly) women, don’t think like you do, doll-face. They have an addiction to flesh and self-gratification. You are their fix. Their obsessions and lusts trump logic, and your feelings. They are literally predators. Hunters. Exploiters who plan evil. Some plan in advance, some plan in the moment. Some are professionals. Some are first-timers. They are, in most cases, right next to us and blending in as neighbors, co-workers, or relatives (see statistics at end). A minute few are females. Others have female sidekicks. Some look suspicious. Most look like angels of light—waiting for you to step outside your boundaries, your senses, your intuition—while you’re thinking, “It’s just not fair! I should be able to go anywhere I want, at any time I want, doing anything I want, so I will” or “I’m so glad I live in a safe neighborhood”.

There is no excuse for their behavior. Their unbridled sexual tendencies and violence is not our fault, but let’s do all we can to not give “crazy” an in.

I would say to use common sense, but most common sense is no longer sensible.
Or sufficient.
These mostly male predators have gone extreme, so we have to go extreme with our precautions.

Now-a-days, to rebel against a predatory, violent-porn-obsessed majority, is a gamble with your life.

You want freedom, but they want what they want – usually your body at any cost.

They want that teeny, tiny, slim chance of an opportunity.

Many of you are providing opportunity like it’s every opportunistic man’s birthday.

Sometimes the opportunity is the time of day or night, sometimes it’s location, or your revealing social media activity; sometimes it’s 3 seconds anywhere at any time when you’re distracted. There’s no logic on their part—self-obsession drives them. People who wait for opportunities that many of us are habitually offering, aren’t in their right minds.

I’m grieved over the fact that we have to make up for their crazy, that we have to adjust our lives to it, but we do. Despite that, there are ways to adjust some of our habits and increase our safety, without being inconvenienced.

I’ve heard some of you say “God will protect me”, but He protects us when we obtain sound wisdom and listen to Him. Even then, nut-cases may try to challenge you.

I don’t want you to get to the point of having to prepare and create your boundaries based on real-world experiences. We should build boundaries based on the recognition and comprehension of the times we live in—on wisdom, foresight, self-preservation—even on others’ painful experiences. We should help protect others by teaching and example.

I know it’s unfair ladies, I know.

But let’s not be fools.

Fools make the best victims.

Evil is waiting for you to make an exception.

Or think you’re the exception.

I’m not trying to scare you Ms. Independent, just trying to raise your awareness. So many women are naive when it comes to personal safety and security. And we often avoid the topic thinking it doesn’t apply to us but the statistics say otherwise.

I am one of those statistics and I don’t want you to be.

While I encourage you to be cautious and alert, I also encourage you to NOT live in fear. I encourage you to be smart. We don’t have a spirit of fear. Our minds and bodies aren’t made to handle fear.

“…whoever listens to me (Wisdom) will live securely and in confident trust And will be at ease, without fear or dread of evil.” Proverbs 1:33 (AMP)

So beautiful ones:

Make adjustments accordingly.

Tweak your freedoms.

Stay alert and aware.

Live joyfully.

Live safely.

My point is, LIVE.

See my TIPS ON HOW TO STAY SAFE,
below or click here to see them on Facebook.

 

P.S.

I know we don’t like to talk about these terrible things, but they’re real things going on in real life. We HAVE to talk about them. We have a responsibility to warn and protect our loved ones and ourselves. There’s evil out there. There are challenges that arise which are necessary to strengthen our character; but there are things within this (topic) that need NOT be endured (and can most likely be avoided). Knowledge plus wisdom is key.

Be sober [well balanced and self-disciplined], be alert and cautious at all times. That enemy of yours, the devil, prowls around alike a roaring lion [fiercely hungry], seeking someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8 (AMP)

For by me (wisdom from God) your days will be multiplied, And years of life shall be increased.  Proverbs 9:11 (AMP)

“I, [godly] wisdom, reside with prudence [good judgment, moral courage and astute common sense], And I find knowledge and discretion.  Proverbs 8:12 (AMP)

ACCORDING TO BJS, NSVRC, and RAINN

THESE STATS ARE THOSE REPORTED!
63% of sexual assaults are not reported!

  • 1 in 3 women experienced some form of violent sexual contact in their lifetime.
  • 91% of victims of rape and sexual assault are female
  • Nearly 2/3 of college students experience sexual harassment
  • 63.3% of men at one university (2002), admitted to committing repeat rapes
  • About 3 in 4 victims (12 years and up) of sexual violence knew the offender (incl. family member, intimate partner, friend, or acquaintance)

LET’S LOWER THESE STATS BY UNDERSTANDING THE TIMES AND CULTURE WE LIVE IN, then adjusting accordingly.

Love you!

Kimberly

TIPS ON HOW TO STAY SAFE

By Kimberly Arland 07/25/2017

People are getting more and more bold with women, children, and parents with their children. Below, some things my Mother and Grandmother taught me along with some recent #advice from #police. I’ve had to defensively apply almost all of these at some time in my life (I’ve got crazy stories).
This is not to make you afraid, but to encourage you to be #alert and wise.

  • Do not let your #children out of your site. There are experienced gropers out there – all they need is 2 seconds with your child. What they do is walk by and touch them inappropriately. No one the wiser but your child affected.
    • Children are even violating other children. Keep your eyes on them at the playground.
    • Always be aware of your surroundings. Even when you’re familiar with them.
    • Don’t go #hiking or any other isolated areas by yourself – no matter what time of day. Even if you have a dog.
    • Stop posting where you are on social media.
    • Stop posting your children in bathing suits and what could be interpreted as “suggestive” positions for pedophiles to copy and save. Not fair but real life.
    • Make your pages and apps private when possible.
    • Don’t accept friend requests from people you don’t know.
    • Turn location off on your phone when possible.
    • Cell phones can be one our biggest distractions. Please don’t walk and text.
    • Before walking away from your door, as soon as you arrive home, close it and lock it.
    • Make sure your windows are locked. Even if you live above the first floor (men are driving pickup trucks to the sides of apartment buildings and going through windows from the tops of their vehicles).
    • Don’t wear ear buds or head phones on both ears. Always be able to hear your surroundings.
    • When putting your #shopping in the car, do not leave your child or purse unattended and do not leave yourself vulnerable when loading them in their child seat.
    • Lock your car at gas stations.
    • When approaching or leaving your vehicle, always be aware of your surroundings. If you see someone with odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel a little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if there were trouble. Learn to trust your instincts. Time and again, #crime #victims tell police they sensed danger but ignored the feeling. Don’t try to second-guess those intuitive feelings.
    • Don’t ever feel like you can’t stop, go back, make a call, cross the street, scream, honk, run, or do anything drastic to feel and be safe. Many women and children are hurt or harassed because they don’t want to embarrass the offender. Safety trumps ego.
    • Properly maintain your vehicle and keep your gas tank at least half full.
    • Always carry your cell phone and make sure it is fully charged.
    • Locate your keys prior to going to your car.
    • Check the front and back of your car before getting in it.
    • If someone is sitting in the passenger side of a car next to you, enter through your own passenger side or wait to get in.
    • Keep a secure hold on your belongings. Do not put them down or on top of the car in order to open the door.
    • Lock your doors as soon as you get into your vehicle.
    • When possible, keep all car doors locked and windows closed while in or out of your car.
    • Park as close as you can to your destination and take notice of where you parked.
    • Avoid parking next to vans, trucks with camper shells, or cars with tinted windows. If you must get in your vehicle, get in through the passenger’s side.
    • If you must shop at night, park in a well-lit area.
    • Do not approach your car alone if there are suspicious people in the area.
    • If necessary, ask mall or store security for an escort before leaving your shopping location.
    • Beware of strangers approaching you for any reason. Con-artists may try various methods of distracting you with the intention of taking your money or belongings.
    • If someone drives alongside you pointing at your car pretending something is wrong to try to get you to pull over, drive to the nearest well-lit and populated gas station and look the car over yourself (or ask an attendant).
    • When coming to a stoplight, look around to see if anyone is nearby. If someone appears threatening or approaches the car, drive away, even if it means going through the light — assuming you can do that without risking a collision.
    • When stopping, make sure you have what has been called a “grace space.” That means enough room between your vehicle and the next so you could pull out. “If you’re pinned in, blare the horn, getting the attention of good people.”
    • A favorite trick of con-artists is rear-ending other vehicles to get them to stop to allow a robbery, assault or carjacking. A person’s first instinct is to jump out of the car and look at the damage, but don’t do that.
    • Police Imposters are becoming more common. There have been incidents of people in cars similar to an unmarked police car. If the car doesn’t have clear markings and lights on top, put on the emergency flashers, motion to the “officer” to follow, and then drive at the speed limit to a safe place. Any police officer should realize what you’re doing. When you get to that location, if you’re still concerned, get out and go to the safe location. A legitimate #police officer will follow. If there’s not enough time to get inside the store or gas station, keep the doors locked and open the window enough to communicate, but not enough so they can reach inside. Request the officer’s photo identification and examine it carefully.
    • An excellent way to handle driving emergencies is a cell phone, but if you don’t have one and it’s not possible to walk someplace easily, stay in the car, make a “Call Police” sign and put it up in the back window. This generally decreases the chance that someone will bother you. If someone does stop, don’t assume they are a Good Samaritan, no matter how nice the person looks; no matter how nice their car. Motorists who see people broken down or with a “Call Police” sign should not stop, but should call for help on your behalf.
    • Most cellphones now have a one-push emergency button set-up. If you don’t already have it, get it and install it. It sends your exact coordinates to whomever you put on your SOS list.
    • Never leave your car unoccupied with the motor running.
    • If you must walk a ways in the dark to your home, walk in well-lit, more populated areas. Even if you have to take a longer route. If possible, walk in the middle of the street (people hide behind cars, in cars and behind bushes and walls).
    • If you must use an ATM, choose one that is located inside a police station, mall, or well-lit location.
    • When having your car serviced or valeted, give the attendant only the car keys, as they often have key duplicators readily available.
    • When your car is serviced or valeted, make sure no personal information is left in the vehicle.
    • Always carry both Roadside #Emergency and Car #Survival Kits.

There are many more #tips. Feel free to add your own to these and share the #knowledge!

MORE VLOGS & BLOGS HERE

#besmart #protect #protection #safetytips #perverts #pedophiles #abduction #safety #boundaries #BJS #NSVRC #metoo #RAINN #victim #statistics #sexualassault #kidnapping #amberalert #thieves #women #parents #mothers #fathers #teachers #humantrafficking #shopping #jogging #running #predators #rape #stalking #assault #wisdom #help #sisterskeeper #offensive

 

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